Packing Up My Bedroom

Photo Credit: Petr Kratochvil

I am starting to pack up my belongings so Father can take them to my house that I will share with Avery. Father said Avery does not want me to see it until our wedding night. I wanted to see it to at least know where I would be living. Father says he will tell me about it when he gets back. I packed up my books, sewing supplies, two of my old dolls that I am saving for my children and some of my clothes.  My hope chest, of course, is all packed and ready to go.

Looking around my room I think about all my memories here. My bedroom is my place of solitude where I go to get away from my brothers and sisters. My sisters share their rooms. Esther and Lorraine share the room across the hall from my room. Leah and Edna are down the hall across from the boy's room. The boys are in one room. They don't spend much time there anyway. Mother said me being the oldest girl should have her own room. Now Esther will be moving into my room. I am not sure what they will do about the others. Probably Lorraine will have to move in with Edna and Leah will take Esther and Lorraine's room.

My head is swimming with thoughts. I am sad to be leaving my room. What will it be like to share a room with Avery? I look forward to my life with him since the lunch we had. I keep looking at my ring that he put on my finger. I won't take it off and I am being so careful with it. It has a diamond in it and looks like it must have cost some money. I feel bad he spent his hard worked money on me. Though it makes me glad too.

One thing I am really nervous about besides the wedding is going to be the first meal I have to make for Avery's and my first meal together. We will need food and I do not know what he will have in our house or even if he is staying there already. He did not say and I did not ask him. Maybe Mother will let me take some food home after the wedding if there is some left over. Father has a whole yard of chickens that he raised for my wedding luncheon at the church hall. This worries me as I want Avery to be pleased that I will know what to do. This is one problem with not being able to talk to him or discuss these issues with him.

Copyright © 2010  Kathleen G. Lupole
Updated 2016

The Engagement Ring

Photo Credit: Josef Petrek

The day spent with the Longworth's was over way too soon. Avery was very attentive to me. Not at all like he was the other time I spent time with him at my house. He pulled my chair out for me in the dining room. At lunch his sisters were asking me questions and all seemed eager to talk to me. Edith, the youngest, asked "Is it true Rachel that you are bringing your own horses with you when you marry Avery?"

I looked up and nodded, "Yes, I am."

Lucy, who is about twelve with  blonde hair and the bluest eyes I have ever seen spoke up, "We heard you refused to marry Avery unless you could bring your own horses!"

I felt myself turning red, "Why no, I didn't say that. Nobody asked me that." I glanced at Avery who was sitting on one side of me. He just grinned and shrugged his shoulders.

Father spoke up, "Now I knew my Rachel would have to have her own horses with her. So I stipulated that in our agreement right from the start. She raised them from foals. Nobody can handle a horse like my Rachel." He turned toward Avery, "You don't have a problem with that do you son?"

Avery answered, "Why, no sir. In fact, I am glad." Then he looked at me for a second, like he was thinking of what to say, then he spoke, "Rachel, I am glad you like horses. You see, my business is horses."

"Horses?" I replied back not knowing what he meant. Was he selling them? Shoeing them?

"I have built my own freight business. I haul supplies for businesses or whoever needs something hauled from town to town."

"You do that all by yourself? Drive from town to town?" Mother asked. By now the whole family was very interested in this business.

"No, m'am. I have three wagons and two other drivers. I drive one of the wagons."

After our lunch we sat in the parlor and our parents talked about the wedding. Our sisters got to know each other. His sister, Margaret who is married and has two children of her own was there for the lunch. Her husband. George was not there as he was one of Avery's drivers and he was delivering a load of lumber to Utica. She talked with me for a long time telling me how much she was looking forward to me joining the family. Avery came over to us, "Hey Margaret, do you mind if I steal this pretty girl away for awhile?"

"Why no Avery, go right ahead. I have to go check the baby anyway."

Avery took my arm and led me out of the parlor. "I thought we'd go out on the patio so we could talk." He didn't really pose it as a question. We went out onto a patio that had a table and chairs and plants all around. Fresh cut flowers were on the table. The birds were singing and the flowers were fragrant. I felt nervous, dizzy and excited all at the same time. He led me to a sofa and I sat down, he sat down next to me and said, "Rachel, I know you hardly know me. I think this whole marriage thing took you by surprise. I want you to marry me, and I know your Father already promised you would marry me. But I want you to tell me that you are marrying me of your own free will. I do not want you to marry me if you do not want it too. Do you understand?" he looked deeply into my eyes, seriously searching for my answer.

I stammered, "Yeees, yes Avery. I understand." I wasn't sure what he wanted me to say.

Then he slid down off the sofa and went down on one knee and took something out of his pocket, "Rachel, I am asking you to marry me and be my wife. Will you do me the honor?" he looked into my eyes and took my hand.

"Why Avery, of course I will." I answered.

He took a ring and put it on my finger. It fit perfectly! It was so beautiful. I was stunned. I had no idea he was giving me an engagement ring. At that moment Mr. Longworth stepped out to the patio, "Oh Avery and Rachel. I didn't realize you were out here. I just came out for a bit of a smoke," as he filled a tobacco pipe.

The rest of the day was exciting. Getting to know his sisters and trying to remember all their names. I kept looking at that ring all the way home. Mother said she had a good feeling about my life with Avery. Now I have a good feeling about it too. I think we will have a good marriage. He is very good looking too. Tall and strong. He has muscles that tell of a man who is used to doing hard work.

I went to sleep dreaming about being Mrs. Avery Longworth. Everything is happening so quickly for me. Going to have my own house and will be having my own children. I think our life together is going to be happy. I am praying to God tonight to help me be a good wife and mother. To help me make him happy and for us to have a joyful, but holy life.

Copyright © 2010 Kathleen G. Lupole
Updated 2016

A Special Day

Photo Credit: Liam Quin

Oh my goodness, I don't know where to start. Yesterday was a beautiful sunny day. We made the trip to Norwich to Longworth's house early. It was a long ride but I was not thinking about the ride too much. I was thinking about seeing Avery. I wore my pale blue dress and it looked perfect. Esther, Leah, Edna and Lorraine sat in the back of the wagon with me. Mother and Father sat up front with Father driving my team, Spud and Tator. He thought they should learn the road since they had the chance. My brothers, Kenneth and Teddy stayed home to do chores.

The Longworths live in a big house right in Norwich. It is very elegant and not at all like our house. Mother looked at Father and rolled her eyes and he smiled back at her catching me watching them. "Yep, Mother dear, our eldest daughter here is doing right well for herself."

"Now that is not a subject to discuss right now. " Mother hushed Father talking in a whisper.

I looked at the house and thought how I always wanted to see the inside of houses like this when we passed them. I had been here to Norwich a couple of times before but Norwich is not really a city by any means. More like a small town. It is growing though. I straightened my hair ribbons and tried to act calm, but I was shaking at the thought of meeting the Longworths and most of all, at the prospect of spending some time with Avery Longworth.

All of a sudden the door opened and there was Mr. and Mrs. Longworth opening the door. Mr. Longworth had a mustache and a twinkle in his eye. He put his hand out to Father, "Welcome, welcome Mr. Kennedy!"

Father grasped his hand, "Thank you Mr. Longworth. Glad to be here. You know my wife of course, Sarah."

Mr. Longworth extended his hand to her, "Mrs. Kennedy, delighted to see again. It's been such a long time."

Mother smiled and replied, "Mr. Longworth, do call me Sarah."

"And do likewise, call me Asa. After all we are about to become family."

We went in the door and entered the house. I eagerly looked around for Avery. Mrs. Longworth came forward and looked at me, she took my hands in her's, "And you must be Rachel, dear."

I nodded. I didn't know what to do, "Good morning Mrs. Longworth."

After that I don't remember much until Avery came in just before we went in for our lunch. He came in and said his hellos to everyone. Then looked at me, didn't say a word for a few minutes. Just looked right in my eyes. I felt very unsettled by his look. Like he was trying to see in my mind or something. I noticed his dark good looks. He has a strong look about him. His face is tanned from working outside I think. He finally spoke to me, "Hello Rachel. I almost forgot how pretty you are." I was completely flustered and tried not to show it.

I will have to finish this diary entry tomorrow. I am trying to put the whole visit down so I will remember every detail for the rest of my life. I will say this though, it was a wonderful day and I can't wait for my wedding day! It will take me some time putting my thoughts down on paper.

Copyright © 2010 Kathleen G. Lupole
Updated 2016

Girl Talk

Photo Credits: Liam Quin

Eliza came over today and we went down to the creek with my sisters. We waded in the water even though it was really cold. Now every time I do anything with them or anyone, I keep thinking I will never do anything with them again. I imagine my sisters will be coming to my new house and spending some nights there every now and then. It is not like I will not see them again. Eliza goes to Norwich shopping about every three or four months. She likes to get her supplies at Wilson's because it is cheaper. So I will see her too. I had fun skipping rocks with them and walking in the cold water. We found some fossils and took them home.

Eliza came to sit beside me on the rocks as I unwrapped some brownies Mother had put in a sack for us to snack on. She said, "Rachel, can I ask you something?"

I looked up and said, "Sure. You can ask me whatever you want."

"It is kinda personal...........if you know what I mean."

I looked at her and said, "Now what could be too personal for you to ask me? Must be about me getting married?" I figured that is the topic on everyone's mind lately, including my own.

"It is." she looked at me with a questioning look.

"Ask away! But first take your pick of Mother's brownies." She came over to me and took one of the brownies, took a bit and sat down on the rocks.

"Aren't you going to be scared to go home with Avery Longworth after your wedding? You don't know him very well and I don't think you have even kissed any boy ever."

"No, I haven't kissed a boy. I never got a chance." I laughed. "But I know my parents would not be sending me to marry Avery Longworth if I wasn't going to be safe with him. He wanted to marry me. So must be he likes me or even loves me."

"Do you love him?"

"Not yet. I think I will learn to love him. Mother says that I will."

After we left the creek and Eliza left, I was in the kitchen helping to prepare supper and I was thinking about the questions Eliza asked me. Do I love Avery Longworth?  I think deep down, I have grown used to the idea of marrying him and being his wife. Being Mrs. Avery Longworth. I am looking forward to the luncheon on Saturday with his family. But especially because Avery will be there too. My future husband.

Copyright © 2010 Kathleen G. Lupole
Updated 2016

An Invitation

Photo Credit: Mead Clarke

Today I have not been feeling very well. I admit it, I am scared. I am scared of getting married. I am scared of leaving Father and Mother, my sisters and yes, even my brothers. I know I can take my horses with me. And that is a comfort to me. But I will be alone with Avery Longworth every day for the rest of my life. What will we talk about? What if he does not like me once he gets to know me? What if I cannot cook and keep house good enough for him?

He is older than me and has been out in the world. I know nothing outside of my little country home and small town. I have only been to a city once in my life. And I did not like it. Of course, I was only 8 years old at the time. We had to go to Binghamton and it was a long ride. Mother's brother, Aaron was getting married to Aunt Dora and that is where she lived. It was a very fancy wedding and that was fun. But the city was full of wagons and people and very uncomfortable for me. The ride was long and rough and I could not wait to get out of the wagon.

Yesterday I received a note from Avery Longworth's mother, she wrote:

My Dear Rachel,

I am looking forward to your upcoming marriage to Avery. I  would like to have you and your family come to our home in Norwich for a luncheon on June 4th at noon. It would be nice to get to know you a little better before your wedding. Avery will be present and is looking forward to seeing you again. 

Fondly,

Abigail Longworth 

I have been reading this note over and over. Mother seemed happy about the invitation. So are my sisters. They like any invitation to go anywhere. Today they were working on hemming some pillow cases that we made. I will wait and do the embroidery work on them later on.  After I am married, the cold winter evenings can get long without something to do. I have always enjoyed doing needlework by the fire.

Avery will be there. That is only 5 days away. What if her note had not been received in time? It seems to be short notice for a special luncheon. Maybe she didn't know if Avery would come? I do not even know if he lives with his family or not. Or what he does for living. I need to ask him some questions when I see him. He is a mystery to me and yet, I think he knows everything about me.

I better go put my clothes together for Saturday. I need to wear a special dress. Maybe my blue pale one will do. It is my best dress from two years ago but it fits good since Mother let it out a little. She exclaimed, "Rachel, you are growing up so fast that I can barely keep you in decent dresses! Before long you will be married and sewing for your own family." I remember thinking to myself, "Never! I am never leaving you and Father." Now here I am doing just what she said.

Copyright © 2010 Kathleen G. Lupole
Updated 2016

The Wedding Gown

Photo Source

I tried on my wedding gown this morning. Mother has worked so hard on it. Aunt Dora came over and helped her sew the lace edging on. Aunt Dora had a piece of white satin that she sewed netting to and made a veil. It is beautiful. I can't believe how it all came together so quickly. Father came in when I was wearing it and Mother was pinning the hem. I looked up at him and he had a tear in his eye. He quickly wiped it away and smiled at me. I felt a lump in my throat and could hardly speak. He looked at me again and said, "Rachel, you are going to make a fine looking bride." Coming from Father that was something I will never forget. He doesn't give compliments easily.

After we finished with the gown and I hung it up. We made lunch and sat in the kitchen and talked. It was a fun day. Aunt Dora is Mother's youngest sister. We love when she comes for a visit. She is the mother of five boys, Edward, Fred, Samuel, Timothy, Lawrence, and two girls, Martha and Louisa. Both of the girls are in school today or they would have been here with her. She told us all the news of her home. Her husband, Uncle Daniel raises cattle. My cousins, the boys all help him and work hard on their farm. They go to school when they can, which is not often. But they live well. They have a big farm and a big white house with pillars. She hugged me before she left and pressed in my hand a gold broach. "Oh Aunt Sara! It is beautiful. But I can't accept this from you. You need it for Martha and Louisa." It was very beautiful and very old. I knew it must have been handed down to her from my grandmother.

"Nonsense, Rachel. This goes to the first girl to get married in each generation in our family. It goes to you. I only had it because your Mother gave it to me for my wedding and would not take it back. So we kind of broke the tradition. Time to get it started back up again." she smiled at me.

"Thank you, I will treasure it."

"Just remember to give it to your first daughter to get married," and with that she was out the door.

I stared at it for a long time. Thinking about her words, "Just remember to give it to your first daughter to get married." I would some day have a daughter of my own getting married doing the same things I am doing today. How can that be? Last year I was playing with my dolls with my sisters. Now I am thinking about having babies with a man I hardly know.

Later that night, I went to Father to tell him good night after we had our prayers. I wanted to tell him how much I would miss him. I went to him and grabbed his hand and looked into his blue eyes. I just stared at him thinking of all the times we spent together in the barn with the horses. How he taught me everything I know. How he made me get back on the first horse that threw me off. Even when I was crying that I would never ride another horse again. Ten minutes later I was back on the same horse again and riding him around the paddock. I was glad he made me get back on. "What is it missy? You got something to tell me?"

I just looked at him and shook my head but held his hand tight. I was going to miss him terribly. "Good night Father."

With that he pulled me to him and gave me a big hug, "Good night honey. See you in the morning."

I crawled into bed and cried myself to sleep.

Copyright © 2010 Kathleen G. Lupole
Updated 2016

The Bridal Shower

Photo Credits: Kathleen G. Lupole

Eliza had a bridal shower for me at her house last Saturday. It was a pleasant day. My girlfriends from school were there and Eliza's sister-in-law, Suzanne, who is pregnant. Two of Avery's cousins, Rebecca and Fern, and my own sisters of course. Eliza had decorated the house in lavender and yellow and had fresh cut flowers everywhere. We ate chicken salad sandwiches, potato soup and fresh vegetables. She made a beautiful cake and wrote on it with frosting, "Best Wishes Rachel." It was almost too pretty to cut.

We played games and talked about what it means to be a wife. They teased me about what my life would be like. I received many beautiful presents. I will never forget any of my friends. Amanda Wilson was one of my closest friends when I was in lower grades. She is a shy girl with a talent for doing any kind of needlework. She works quickly and can easily make something in an afternoon. She gave me a beautiful bedspread that she made, and she worked hard on it. It is an embroidery with horses running across a field and a girl riding one of the horses bareback.  I loved it!

Eliza gave me a nightgown she had sewn. It was light pink with roses on it. I will save it for my wedding night. The others all gave me gifts they had made and a couple of them gave me a box of canned fruits and vegetables to take to my new home. I can hardly believe it will be really happening, and soon too. I am beginning to feel like a grown woman already.

Suzanne, being the only one of us who is married, and pregnant too, gave me some ideas of what married life is like. She said she likes it most of the time. She is very excited about having her first baby. She said it makes her feel tired during the day. Being pregnant that is. She said she tries to take a nap in the afternoon so she has the energy to finish making dinner and other chores. She said her husband, Nathan is very considerate of her, and treats her good. Nathan, of course, is Eliza's brother, and I have known him my whole life. I think of him as a boy who always picked on us. Now I see him in a new light.

Rebecca, who is Avery's cousin said Avery has been busy building our house. She said it is very nice, and has a big barn with a paddock, and a huge garden. I am so curious about it. I would love to see it now. I wanted to ask her more questions about Avery since I know little about him. She did say he has his own business. Now my parents never told me that! What kind of business I wonder. I started to ask her when her sister, Fern spoke up, and said, "Rebecca! You are not supposed to tell her anything about Avery! Remember what Ma said!"

Rebecca made a face at her younger sister and said to me, "She's right. Ma said we are not to gossip or tell anything about Avery to you today at the shower, or else we could not come. She made us promise. Sorry."

I replied back a little disappointed, "That's okay."

She answered, "I know you are curious. We really don't know a lot about Avery himself. He has always been busy, and we never saw much of him anyway."

After the shower was over and everyone helped me load up my buggy, they hugged and kissed me good bye. I knew the next time I saw some of them would be the day of my wedding to Avery Longworth.

Copyright © 2010 Kathleen G. Lupole
Updated 2016